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Eldaraenth The Bardic Circle   
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PC ELDARAENTH
submitted by zimm:

He is not a bad fighter;
he is DEFENSE CHALLENGED\ PARRY CHALLENGED.

· Fighters do not have beer guts;
they have LIQUID GRAIN STORAGE FACILITIES.

· The wizard is not skinny;
she is UN-NEEDED FLESH DEPRIVED.
·
The baron is not drunk;
he is CHEMICALLY INCONVENIENCED
or ACCIDENTALLY HORIZONTAL.

· He does not kick ass;
he PRESENTS SUPERIOR SKILL AT THUMPING.

· It is not called armor;
it is an EXTERNAL OTHER-THAN-FLESH LIFE PRESERVING DEVICE.

· That elf is not fly or a hotty;
she is a BREASTED INDIGIONOUS SENSIENT BEING.

· That man is not a thief;
he is a PERSONAL RESOURCES RELOCATOR.

· That Knight does not act like a total ass-
He develops a case of RECTAL-CRANIAL INVERSION.

· The duke does not write to damn much;
he is a DISCUSSION OVER-ACHIEVER.

· The Ranger does not He does not always get lost -
He INVESTIGATES ALTERNATIVE DESTINATIONS.

· The wife does not nag you about your time and money in Eldaraenth;
She becomes VERBALLY REPETITIVE.

· The child is not a snotling;
he is a MUCOUS FACED YOUTH OF ELDARAENTH.
·
 The Barwench is not Easy;
she is HORIZONTALLY ACCESSABLE.

· He is not and evil overlord;
he is a MISDIRECTED OVER ACHIEVER.

· He is not a Drow bastard;
he is an EBON SKINNED EVIL DOER.

· He is not a greenskin;
he is a JADE SENSIENT BEING and RE-ARRANGER OF PERSONNAL EFFECTS AND EXTREMETIES.

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Submitted by Thessaly:

We're not geeks for wearing medieval clothes--
we're chronologically challenged